Skip to main content

Netflix, Fever and Chills?

For a writer, it's a total bummer to stay home sick AND be too sick to write. Or worse, to have a little cutie who needs round-the-clock loving during an illness.

I have lived through a few of those weeks during my past five years as a mama, and I've learned there is only one thing to do. Give up on those thoughts of catching up on chores, writing that synopsis, or doing anything else productive. Focus on healing in the form of snuggling in bed and watching free stuff on Hulu.

Yeah, my clever post title says Netflix, but I'm not even that fancy. I get my movies strictly from the library and whatever freebies are available on Hulu without a subscription.

But I've found some pretty good ones over the years, which you may also be able to find free on Hulu (though their availability does change), Netflix, your local library, or some online criminal underworld.

I tend to go for foreign films because they really transport me to a different world. My taste also skews a little dark and twisted, so if you're squeamish, you might want to stick to something bland like episodes of House Hunters. And of course, if you have a child at home, you'll want to scroll down to the family-friendly selections. But if you crave a little something shocking in your entertainment, even under the influence of fever meds, this list is for you.

Here is my curated list of (maybe) free movies that will massage your muses as you convalesce.

For adults only:

 4 Lovers: extra-steamy French film with a lot of psychological suspense and very graphic doin'-it scenes, about two couples who swap partners

Madeinusa: the darkest and creepiest Cinderella variant you'll ever see, set in a rural village in the Andes

Unconscious: trippy adventures with Sigmund Freud; silly, steamy, and romantic

Northanger Abbey: bringing Jane Austen's dry wit and sultry undertones alive in a film that could never have been shown in her time (if films had existed then)

Thesis: 1990s thriller about a film student in Madrid who discovers a snuff film--and evidence of a snuff ring operating within her school... kind of like 8MM with 100% less Nicholas Cage and a lot more twists and turns

Demons: a psychological thriller miniseries based on a Dostoevsky novel, featuring some totally creepy hot actors

Karen llora en el bus: the adventures of a middle-aged, pampered and stifled housewife who decides to leave her husband and strike out on her own in a rough city, with no support; a tale of redemption, not horror

Sand Dollars: for anyone interested in seeing an elderly Frenchwoman play colonialist Don Juan in the Dominican Republic

The House of the Sun: the adventures of Soviet hippies in the 1960s

For snuggling with family (or, a couple of films that are less likely to leave you traumatized):

The Secret of Kells: a beautiful animated film with rich, Irish-inspired artwork and a haunting soundtrack, about a boy monk who teams up with a wolf-girl forest deity to overcome the evil powers of a death-dealing forest god and the destructive forces of Vikings (possibly too scary for tiny tots but highly entertaining for less sensitive kids)

Alamar: a dreamy, sweet depiction of a young boy's seaside summer with his father off the coast of Mexico ("boring" enough to put a kid to sleep, if that's your objective)


What are YOUR favorite sick-day binges that feed your imagination when you can't work? Feel free to leave suggestions in the comments.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

35 Great Things About Turning 35

The prime of life starts at 35! It's the best-kept secret from younger people, but your 35th birthday is a major cause for celebration. For mine, I have made my own listicle of 35 reasons why experts agree that 35 is the best age to be:
You get to say, "I'm 35." The number 35 carries so much more gravitas than 30, but you're only a few years older. At 34, I've started fudging my age--by adding a year. People automatically take me seriously, and if they don't, at least they tell me I look young for my age. (Eye roll, hair toss, "whatever.")  35-year-olds DGAF. Inner chill reaches new heights at 35. Despite its #2 status on this list, it's the #1 response I hear about what's best about hitting 35. My gorgeous friend Nerlie was beautiful and resilient and wise beyond her years in high school, but now, at age 35, she gets to fully enjoy being herself on her own terms. She writes,  "I've survived so much that I don't waste time o…

A Bad Romance Starring Till Lindemann, Sophia Thomalla, Gavin Rossdale, Simone Thomalla, Sven Martinek, Andy LaPlegua, and Leila Lowfire

November 2018 Update: Sophia is settled in with Gavin now, I guess, and Till is spending time with 36-year-old (hell yeah, thank you, sir) Ukrainian singer Svetlana Loboda. He is either her latest babydaddy or doing her the favor of bearding as such (not that he's great with beards, but we don't mind--we know how much he loves pregnant and lactating ladies) to help her keep some distance from her crazy ex who cuts his wrists over her. The juice continues...


To misquote Gaga, "I don't speak German, but I can look at foreign tabloids and guess what's going on if you like."


I guess it would be more professional and ladylike for me to be above this sordid celebrity gossip, but I'm not. I'm so not.


So let's see if I've got this straight. From what I gather...


Metalgod Till Lindemann, 54, and model Sophia Thomalla, 27 (upper left) recently exited a five-year, on-off, opennish relationship, which began when Sophia's actress mother Simone (upper r…

Ich Liebe Rammstein: Richard

Richard Z. Kruspe
Richard Zven Kruspe is Rammstein's founding father, lead guitarist, and natural frontman.

***IMPORTANT UPDATE, 2018***: Richard has immortalized his lifelong bromance with Till in a tender duet about their friendship, "Let's Go" by Richard's side band Emigrate. Till sings words such as "Zwei Herzen in mir schlagen" with sincerity and I think I am now deceased.

He's gregarious, well-spoken in both German and English, a professional showman, and an enthusiastic promoter for the band. In German, his name is pronounced "REE-kard," and in Germanglish, "Reeshard," or "Reesh" for short. Richard is sexy, and he knows it. To many Rammstein fans, he is the cuuuuuuute one. His Facebook page would have you believe it.

Legend has it that Richard has a lovechild with lead singer Till Lindeman. The myth is based in complicated facts and figures, including one unconventional love triangle. Circa 1990, Richard and Till …