The Magic Nutshell

Singer-songwriter Lea Morris takes a walk with her personal concept of success in this insightful video. She contrasts the American dream of wealth, fame, and power with the idea of personal fulfillment, which can vary widely. I resonate with her personal definition of success as the ability to create and experience joy in everyday life, and I was inspired to reflect upon not only what my definition of success is but who has attempted to define success for me throughout my life and why . It's easy to recognize that "society" influences us to define success in terms of metrics on money, attention, and influence. But who actually does the dirty work of drilling those beliefs and values into our minds? Why is it so difficult for some of us to feel that we have the right to define success differently for ourselves? What significant people in our lives recorded the voices in our heads that tell us things that sometimes conflict with the quieter truths in our souls? Were we e

No matter how secure we are, we all experience moments of dread. -Mary Alice, the dead narrator of Desperate Housewives Friends, I have reached an age when I can't recognize which other people are my age, including this shifty broad in the mirror. She hasn't grown out of her teenage acne yet, and her elbows have been that wrinkly since she was 12. She has a new streak of white hair, but what trendy Gen Zer doesn't? Then again, observe the old-timey side part.  She thought this mirror might make her look like a cute pinup girl from another century, but instead she's seeing a reflection of Grandma. But doesn't Grandma look great for her age? Didn't she always? What does that mean, exactly? Anyway, she thought it would be fun to watch Desperate Housewives while folding laundry the other day, because she has never seen it before, having had no interest in the show when it was on the air, not even ironically, because she was in college when that show premiered. (She

My final post in the 2021 "Pocket of Joy" series, which was inspired by the one and only JVN and his commitment to embracing joyful little moments no matter what else is going on, is all about the premiere of Queer Eye Season 6 on New Year's Eve--tomorrow!! I never get tired of watching these guys swoop in and fairy dust a random person who has become stuck in the mud--one at a time, over and over, like the title character of "The Star Thrower" does, enjoying the singular salvation of each and every one. It reminds me that in every human life there is suffering and difficulty and unfair disadvantage, but there is also a limitless sea of opportunity in which to play. Getting washed up doesn't mean we're done as long as we can accept a little help diving back in there. This show is a fun reminder for everyone who has survived the past couple of years that when we're at our worst, there are so many ways in which things can get better. May we all keep o